Fluid Test...

OMG!!! Today i have my fluid test
but i didnt prepare anything yet
that makes me feel butterflies in my stomach
every time i have tests or whatever you know that's big
the same old shit happens to me
wishing i can go back in time
wishing all the hypothetical, perfect life i may have
but that's impossible
let's face it, we are just humans
have needs, emotions, downs and ups
anyhow i still want to write it out loud
what i want to do and what i should do

this is the list of wishful thoughts that i always have
before exams/ tests:

i wish i could turn back time to make the situation better
i wish i could go back and spend more time with books
i wish i could be more disciplined in time management
i wish i could be more focused in class
i wish i could be a GENIUS!!!

believe it or not, i can control 4 out of 5 items in the list
in conclusion, i am the one who should be responsible for my own failures
to choose and decide what i want in my life
stop the finger-pointing expressions and actions
i am who i want to be


"Life is to be lived, not controlled, and humanity is won by continuing to play in face of certain defeat." ~Ralph Ellison~